Better poetry?

Posted by lieguy on 30 July 2010

Now, I’ve begun to dedicate myself to English class this year, and so now we’ve begun poetry. She gave us some pictures (we weren’t allowed to show anyone), and had to write a poem about it. My picture was really psychedelic, with this guy sitting on a rock, his bike on the floor, with a baby blue sky above and aside a field of pink grass. I just proof-read it for about 5 minutes. This is what came out-
Daydreaming, wasting the day away,
Thinking about life, of friends, and as the grass sways,
So the breeze blows, kissing my hair,
Touching my face, my nose, my eyes, who just stare,
Into the distance, into space, into time,
While I daydream, my weakness, my crime;
A felony to logic, to thought, to philosophy,
To Socrates, to Homer, Plato, Ptolemy,
I don’t care, I don’t mind, time can wait,
While I stop and analyze my fate, my destiny;
I sit, daydreaming, wasting the day away,
Hopeless to my desires, my dreams, this reoccurring theme,
So I decide to redeem, myself, and I stand.
Its suppose to be read continuously, pausing only at the semicolons and periods. I know its pretty bad, but I’ve been doing poetry for only a month!
I also only have 10 minutes to write it.


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  1. Ronnie commented on July 30, 2010 at 9:47 am

    I disagree that there are no bad poems. This is not bad, though, for the time you spent on it.


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